Extreme Makeover Weight Loss Edition - Independence for Ashley

I couldn't help but root for Ashley.  She reminds me of myself when I got out of high school and was learning my way in the world...while working on getting fit at the same time.

One thing I never had to deal with were unsupportive parents when it came to better eating and working out.  They were always on my side, wanting me to be healthier and to overcome the junk and fast food habits we had all developed.  But Ashley had a dad who was never around because of his drug habit, and a mom who constantly put her down.  Her sisters seemed supportive at times, while at other moments they acted more like their mom.  I can tell you one thing...my very sweet mom, if she was still alive, would have wanted to reach through the TV tonight and smack some sense into Ashley's mom.  (I know I sure did!)  My mom was the kindest lady in the world - but she would never have stood for the names Ashley's mom called her and all of the swearing at her.  No wonder Ashley wanted to get her own place!

She did really well losing the weight, even though she fell short of her first two goals - by 12 pounds each time.  Like Chris said, she was working through the issues with her family members at the same time as she was taking this fitness journey, so she still made tremendous progress.  Thankfully a friend finally let Ashley move in with her and her roommates, so she could get out of her toxic home environment.

Chris was able to get Ashley to have a breakthrough in Hawaii, where she hiked up a volcano by herself with him waiting at the top.  (I admit, that would have freaked me out!)  Then once at the top, she had to zipline 700 feet down to the bottom.  (Once again- freakout time for me!!!)  But once she accomplished these tasks, she became a much more confident person.  So...there are times when doing something that freaks you out is GOOD for you!

Ashley had her final weigh-in in Vegas on her 21st birthday.  She went from 323 pounds to 167 - a loss of 156 pounds.  And she looked amazing!  She also is getting along better with her family, thanks to Chris and the friend who helped get her out of that house.  She is now happy and ready to take on life...which includes becoming a personal trainer.

Ashley proved the Serenity Prayer...she accepted the things she couldn't change (family), changed the things she could (herself), and gained the wisdom to know the difference.  I see a very bright future for her, includng helping many other people reach their own goals.  Go Ashley - pay it forward!

Biggest Loser 13 Challenge - Still Looking For That Balance!

I still haven't found what I'm looking for...

Yes, thanks to my new job and U2 I have that song stuck in my head. And for good reason. You know that balance I talked about last week? I'm still looking for it. Now, I know it takes time to find it. You don't just switch from one type of schedule to a completely different one without some struggle. But when you're a writer who is determined to finish revising your manuscript and you have only a few hours left each week to get that done - along with housework, exercise, family time, prayer, etc. - you want that balance and you want it NOW.

Throw into the mix that I caught whatever bug is going around at work. Since I'm new I have to go in, so I must get some rest when I get home. The job itself is going pretty well so far, and I know that once I'm past being sick I can start to find my rhythm. (Rhythm is any form is important to this music & dance girl!) It's just a little frustrating.

I did see a tiny bit of progress on the scale today. I lost .4 pound, which is more than last week and pretty good for being sick all weekend. I'll take it...and I'll move on to the new week determined to make it better.

As for my frustration, I'm trying not to let it get to me. I'm on my knees often, asking God to help me find the balance I need so I can get everything done and be a healthier person in every way. Sometimes it's hard not to worry, but I know I have to let go and let God so I don't lose my mind.

And I'm off now to do some more revisions!

Biggest Loser 13 Challenge - Balancing Act

I changed my weigh-in day to Sunday now, so I can blog the same day about the results and the way my week has gone pertaining to losing this weight. With the new job, it's difficult to step on the scale Tuesday morning and find time to blog it since I get home from work and spin just in time for Biggest Loser. And that blog has to get done right after the show so I can get some sleep and get to work the next day. So Sundays it is.

This morning. I found no change in my numbers...I stayed exactly the same. I suppose this is a good thing considering the major changes in my schedule - eating, sleeping, writing, everything - has been rearranged to fit the new work hours. So I'm learning how to balance it all and still get everything done.

I'm thankful that I have a Monday through Friday job with normal hours, instead of retail or some other shiftwork. I'm also grateful that God sent me this job to help pay the bills since my freelancing isn't yet at the point that it could be my full time job and we really need the money. Things are going pretty well there, and the people I work with are really nice and very helpful.

I also know that I'm not the only person in the world who has to work all day and then figure out how to get everything else done, so I know we all struggle with this. I will figure how how to balance it all, including my writing since that is my life's passion and purpose. I need to get the revision on my novel done so I can get it out there.

Of course I will have an adjustment period. I've freelanced from home for five years so I got set in my ways. (When I had other jobs during this time, they were part-time so it wasn't as hard to adjust.) If I had trouble sleeping the night before, I could always go back to bed for a couple of hours after my son left for school before starting my day. Now I have to jump in the shower right after he gets on the bus and leave soon after for work. There is no room for insomnia, which only causes me more anxiety knowing I have to get enough sleep at a certain time. That anxiety makes me sleep even less, and I have no chance to make up for it until the weekend, when I'm trying to get all of the other stuff done.

This is a big change for me, and sometimes I get frustrated. One of the keys is making sure I don't just grab anything to eat so I don't fall back into old habits. I need to make a plan so everything can fall into place as much as possible. I know that with a lot of prayer I will get there...but for now I'm taking it a day at a time!

Biggest Loser 12: Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

On this week's Biggest Loser, the contestants learned that the one constant in the show is that THINGS ARE GOING TO CHANGE.

The other lesson? DEAL WITH IT!

You just knew that there was going to be a big shake-up, with the Black team gloating that they all stuck together and would continue to do so. Never mind that they actually sent a member of the Black team home last week...I guess somehow that doesn't count. But I'm sure Jen had to smile at home seeing what happened next. (Now I didn't just smile - I actually laughed so loud that I was afraid the neighbors heard me.)

Let me preface this by saying that I get it. For anyone, whether on TV or not, to have to switch trainers...well, it's definitely not easy. You do get used to that person's way of doing things, especially if it's working for you. When something is working, you don't want to lose that rhythm, and when a situation in life causes things to change it throws you for a loop. That's why even going on the ranch is such a big thing. These contestants have been stuck in the same way of life for a long time, and the biggest change of all is to get off the couch and throw yourself to the Biggest Loser lions.

But when Alison informed the teams that they were going to be broken up and moved around for the rest of the season, my first thought was that they were going to have their payback. Most of them immediately panicked, while some tried to stay calm until the high-calorie picnic basket game was over and they knew exactly where they stood.

Those picnic baskets would have given even Yogi Bear a heart attack. Did you see how many calories were in those meals? Yogi would have to hibernate for much longer than winter after eating all of that. As much as I love Southern food, Vinny's breakfast made sick to my stomach. Sunny's Mexican dinner most resembled my favorite, although not nearly that portion size and not as often as she said she indulged. (Moderation is your friend!)

Once the musical teams challenge was complete, everyone pretty much lost it. Antone and Jessica were relieved to stay with their original trainers, but still upset that they didn't have the same teammates. The most dramatic reaction came from the Black team members that had to leave Bob - you would have thought that he was divorcing them and moving to Siberia. This, while I understood, came from the same people who harrassed a certain someone the week before about being too attached to Bob. So this is where the laughter came in. You're not so different after all! (BEHOLD - the power of Bob!)

The only person actually glad to leave her trainer was Bonnie. Obviously since she butted heads with Anna she was glad to go with Dolvett. (I wonder how many calories her happy dance burned?) It turns out that Dolvett was a good thing for Bonnie, getting her to deal with her grief as no one else had been able to do before. And Dolvett & Anna dealt well with the people who acted like they were afraid to leave their daddy to go to kindergarten. Dolvett had to watch John sobbing in Bob's arms, then train him. Dolvett knew it was nothing personal and that he would prove himself to his new team. Anna actually told Joe to stop acting like someone took his toy away and be a man. (LOVING this new, feistier Anna!)

I'm sure it took longer for the new teams to warm up to their trainers than was actually shown on TV, since of course the episode would need to be a couple of hours longer to show it all. But in the end everyone began to embrace the change and pulled great numbers on the scale. The big twist? For whichever team came in last, the other two teams got to decide who would go home.

The Red team was low on the totem pole this time, so the Blue and Black teams got to vote. Since John couldn't be voted off, it came down to Bonnie and Jessica. Somewhat surprisingly, Jessica was sent home...and Ramon was NOT happy. (Looks like they will all deal with his wrath next week!) As sad as I am to see Jessica go, a part of me is excited to see what Bonnie will do next, since she is starting to emerge from her cocoon of grief with Dolvett's help. Everything happens for a reason...eevn if we don't know what that reason is for a long time.

Of course, Jessica is workin' it at home, and this Clevelander won't even hold it against her that she had some Steelers training her. (Hey - football loyalties are fierce!) Tune in next week, as Biggest Loser continues with even more drama than Days of Our Lives! I bet Ali sometimes forgets which set she's on sometimes! ;o)

Speaking Sleepinese

The other morning, my still tired son got up for school and began to eat his breakfast. As he tried to ask me a question, he said something that made absolutely no sense. I repeated back what he said to me, which made him snap out of it and laugh...asking, "Did I really say that?" Itold him yes, and on the spur of the moment I said he must be speaking another language, which I dubbed "sleepinese". That only made him laugh harder.

As I've thought about my new word since then, I began to realize that many of us speak some form of sleepinese, even if we are wide awake. We continue to say the same things over and over to ourselves...things that make us think that we can't change our lives for the better and that we're stuck in the same place we've always been. We run on autopilot, doing what we've always done because it's all we know, and it's our comfort zone. It feels so much easier to sleepwalk through our lives and speak those words of mediocrity or defeat. We tell ourselves that it would take too much effort to change, we're too old now, or where we are right now is OK...even if deep down we are really sick of being stuck where we are and tired of being unhealthy.

Just as actual sleepwalking can be dangerous, so can speaking sleepinese and continuing in our life ruts. We need to step out in faith, speaking words of health, life, and empowerment. We must ask God for his help...not just praying our usual words without really listening to what we say to Him, but truly speaking to God from our souls and listening for His answers. When you catch yourself saying those words of sleepinese, change them immediately. Ask God lead you to the words that will get you on the path to living a full life, and the courage to put those words into action.

No more sleepwalking through life...it's time to shine, just the way God made us to do!